It was only once I was at the venue that I realised the last train back was, what ended up being, an hour after they got on stage. I saw them play for around 45 minutes and they were amazing. Highlight probably being Jesse just standing back playing the guitar while the entire crowd sang the start to Tommy Gun, pure awesomeness. But I had to leave early which meant missing half their set, including some of my favourite songs. Needless to say I was pretty gutted at the time and as the days have passed that disappointment has only grown.
All I've done since is watch videos of them online from the fellow Manchester goers, and read reviews and comments about how amazing they were. I don't know what it is, I've never really been overly interested in going to gigs or anything like that, but being there was just different. I was both lost and free. For that moment, there was nothing else on my mind, nothing more important, I didn't care about anything, I wasn't worrying about anything, I was just joyous, screaming at the top of my lungs, living in that moment. That feeling is like a drug, and now that I've had a taste, I want more.
I looked around at the people there, and as cliché as it sounds, it just felt as if I belonged. My tastes in music, movies, TV, clothes, etc. have always been different to my best friends. And that's not really a problem, you don't need things in common to be close, and besides we'll other interests that we share. But it would really be lovely to have someone close to me who shares the same weird passions as me. You normally meet your closest friends in manufactured situations like school, university, work, and you can't choose their interest, they are not filtered by what they're in to. Unlike say for example the internet, where you can just follow and unfollow people by what you have in common. I knew I shared something I hold very dear with all the people at that venue, and that's not a something I can say about many people in my life. There was something attractive in that.
All I want to do now is go see them again, I feel incomplete, I want the full experience. They only have a few more shows left and the only realistic one I could go to would be Birmingham on Wednesday. Plus, that show starts a lot earlier so no worries about missing any of it. One problem however, I did not plan for this and I have no money. I spent most of what I had on a good couple of days in Crewe. If I had known I would’ve cut down on the take away! I’ve not completely given up on the hope, but it’s looking very unlikely at the moment. But I will do everything in my power to make it happen. I don’t know when they will next tour, if ever. What I do know is that if I don’t get to see them again, I will regret it and won’t be able to shake that little feeling.
People who know me will tell you I go through phases of obsessing over different things. This is definitely my Brand New phase. Again. Unlike people, music is a constant, it is there whenever I want it, whatever mood I’m in, and it won’t ever leave me. I’m now off to my happy place, so until next time, happy scrolling.
“It used to be the reason I breathed, but now it’s choking me up..”
x
