Every time I click 'New Post' it scares me. It's so blank and empty. Daunting. I don't like starting things. Don't think tonight will be a long one, but have been meaning to write on here for a few days but just never quite found the time. Seeing as I'm currently fully fueled on coke and Maryland, I thought I'd give it a crack.
Recently everything is been going good. It's hard to explain. Like my life has just sort of all fell in to place. I belong. I'm more comfortable in myself and those around me. I'm moving onto a new chapter of my life and I'm excited by it. I welcome it, whereas in the past I was afraid of change. I guess everyone says this, but I feel right now I have a really good bunch of friends from Uni. They are cool people, and even though our relationships are now virtually all technology based, it makes me happy. On the other hand, I have a growing number of friends here, who I now regularly enjoy the company of. This has not always been the case. There are still days where I want to crawl under my duvet and disappear from the world, to just be alone, but these days are becoming increasingly rare. I have the odd day to myself, just to keep me sane.
The last time I had one of these days to myself, just happened to be the day I should have been with all my peers. I didn't go to my graduation. There are numerous valid reasons I recite to people who ask me why, but the truth is I should have been there. I know I would have probably not enjoyed the day anyway, but I feel like it'll be something I look back on with a hint of regret. But what's done is done, and now to move on.
Moving on to this coming week, which has been long in the making and plenty overdue. I'm going back to my adopted hometown of Crewe on Tuesday for the week, to see an old acquaintance. To be honest, there were plenty of nights I went to bed worrying about everything surrounding the event, that I was more tense and stressed rather than looking forward to it. But like the way of life, things usually have a way of working themselves out and falling into place. Leaving me to concentrate on being excited.
Thought/Quote/Lyric of the day...
"Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength".
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day saying 'I will try again tomorrow'".
"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened".
x
Change doesn't always have to be bad. I remember that time when we spoke on the scaffolding about friendship and I am happy your views and way of life has changed and been put in to place. You are different from the Bilal i first met, not completely different but you seem to have a more positive, vibrant outlook on life and I am happy I've been part of that... and the last quote I have read many times and it is indeed true. Some things happen for a reason and life is too short to dwell and say what if? Smile because it happened to you and count yourself lucky that it even happened in the first place x
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