The Collection - Part 2

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My longest poem, but the quickest to write.

Insomnia

Counting time in my mind
Look at all the things you’ll find
In my space, familiar face
Another memory gone to waste
Broken soul growing old
It has already all been told
Seeing red, being dead,
A ghost living inside my head
Energy sparks in me
A sudden surge that I can’t see
Cut too deep, I can’t sleep
All I have to do is leap
Midnight screams, in my dreams
Nightmares are my breathing scenes
To my friends, I love them
But every story has to end

Every breath that is left
Is one step closer to my death?
And I blink, I can’t think
I am running out of ink
Strangling stress, what a mess
I’m innocent till I confess
Troubled youth, hunting proof
No-one ever knows the truth
Lowered down in the ground
That’s where my body can be found
Am I dumb? I am numb
When will death and company come?
Feeling lost, bleeding cross
Will you deliver me to my boss?
Closing hand, don’t expand
Point it high and make a stand

I will glove all my love
I will make you take my drug
Lovely girl, ugly world
Let me win and let it swirl
Wipe your tears, I’m still here
Living in all of your darkest fears
I have grown all alone
In this house that I call home
All I hate, phony fakes
No one has what it takes
Embers flick, fires lit
Not being able to commit
Tell me why the world will lie
I have even failed to die
Counting time in my mind
Look at all the things you’ll find

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Just something I was fuckin' around with.

Acronym For Your Name

Bewildered In Life And Love,
Some thing’s will never change
My sad and lonely existence
It’s bound to remain the same

Believing In Lie After Lie,
You led me further astray
Our relationship could never grow
When you were always away

Because I’ve Loved And Lost,
By the saying I’m appalled
That, its better to have loved and lost
Then to have never loved at all

Broken Innocence Left A Legacy,
Turning a child into a ghost
Life through my blood shot eyes
Now to that lets all toast

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For good friends that have become distant.

The Break-Up Song

Spring in the blossoming sun
Summer when we were born
Autumn in the playing fields
Winter our hands were warm

Spring started to get cloudier
Summer dampened our shine
Autumn withered all promise
Winter reigned in our time

Spring became awfully lonely
Summer was miserable too
Autumn wanted me to say
Winter is here missing you

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I heard Em's verse on Airplanes and had to have a go myself.

Shooting Star

Let’s pretend I never made it this far
Let’s pretend I got stuck at the start
Pretend I was happy being a kid
Pretend I was good at everything that I did
Like I aced all my classes at school
And I was the dude that was classed as cool
Pretend I never always felt so alone
Like I never doodled on every book that I owned
Pretend I just hung around and played with my friends
Pretend I even had a friend to say was my friend
And I walked around wearing clothes that fit
And I wasn’t picked on, bullied, or kicked
Pretend I had a dad at home to put me straight
My mum wasn’t in the hospital and I didn’t arrive too late
I never thought of suicide since the age of nine
And I never threw up those pills that I took that time
Pretend I wasn’t obsessed with every girl that I met
And I actually had the balls to say what I felt
Pretend my dreams weren’t so unrealistic
I seized my chance and never feel like I missed it
In fact, pretend I’m glad that I made it this far
And never look to the sky to wish upon that shooting star

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Inspired by Man On Fire.

St. Jude, Patron Saint Of Lost Causes

Give me a reason to live
As I stare into an empty bottle
Slow my mind, ease my pain
So what if I need a few sedatives?

I don’t care for the world
It really doesn’t need me.
Phones ring and doorbell knock,
Clocks tick and nobody’s home

Derelict mind state. Abandoned.
A dim light flickers hopelessly.
Wallowing in the stench
Of my own self pity. Agonising.

Out of all human consciousness.
Where did it all go wrong?
How did it come to this?
Do you think God will forgive us?

I hear lost voices echoing.
No light at the end of the tunnel
No fairytale ending. Until;
You gave me a reason to live.

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