One Down, However Many To Go

This will be my 24th post, and the first one I've written during the day. I really have no desire to write when it's still light outside, but will probably have to make exceptions for this month. Yesterday was my first fast, and it went better than I had expected. The not eating part I can just about handle, what's annoying is waking up in the middle of the night. As if it's not bad enough trying to fall asleep once a night. the tiredness kills just as much as the hunger does. Plus, it's very hard to eat at that time, especially after the big meal the night before. I would try and tell you what I eat to close and open my fast, but I'm just going to put it down as some 'Asian stuff'. So seeing as I will be having early nights, and need something to pass the time during the days; this will be my new creative writing slot.

I've decided that the two things I want to take out of this experience is to complain less and appreciate more. I tend to moan a lot about my life and the things in it but the truth is, I am very blessed and have way more than I need. I have a home, I have a family, and at the end of the 18 hours I get to have a huge feast, there are many who do not have the same luxuries. There are millions going hungry and not by choice. Also, I sometimes tend to be a fussy eater but after going hungry for so long, you really do appreciate what's put in front of you. Hopefully, incorporating these two aspects in my life will help me find some peace within myself.

Something I learned a few days ago got me thinking. A boy I went to secondary school with, and who was in a few of my lessons, just got sentenced to life in prison for attempted murder. I remember seeing him on my street a few months back and him smiling and waving at me from across the road. It came as a bit of a shock really, and makes you think of how different peoples life's are. Who would have known back then what was in store for us? How is it that I'm here and he's there? What's happened to all the other people I knew as a child? It also got me thinking about a year from now, will I be sitting here and asking the same question about the people who are so close to me now. Past experiences have taught me I will. It upsets me.

All this got me thinking of my childhood. The other day me, my dad, and Kashy started playing Cricket in the garden. I have not played garden cricket in years and it really did make me happy. I spent a large amount of my childhood playing in that garden with anyone who was around, dad, uncles, Hassan, whoever. I remember of titanic battles which lasted hours, where grazed knees and elbows were all the rage. It was literally where I learned everything I once knew about Cricket. The rules are still the same as they were more than ten years ago; same wall for the fours, same door for the six, hit the window it's out, hit it into another garden it's out, all of the wall we play against is the automatic wicket keeper, and one handed catches of the walls are allowed. The only thing that's changed is that I've become a little too big for my small garden. I sometimes find myself wondering of what may have been, if I stuck with Cricket. Once upon a time, I represented Leicestershire in the Youth Games. I remember there being 600 children in the first trial, and over the period of four or five more, it got reduced to a squad of 15 and I was named captain of that team. Even though it was a long time ago, and only lasted a few years, it was the last time I felt I was the best at something I was doing.

Continuing with the theme of my childhood, I watched Toy Story 3 (which I didn't see what all the big fuss was about?) but it did remind me of how I religiously played with my wrestling action figures. Growing up as the only boy with three sisters, I pretty much entertained myself, and my favourite hobby was playing with my wrestling men. I had so many wrestlers, rings, and props over the years, it's unreal. Hours would drift away. I used to collect anything I could find and use them as weapons, for example, I remember making a table out of lollipop sticks. Oh I was cool. But then just like in the movie I grew too old, I passed them on to Kashy and that's the last I saw of them. I keep everything, I regret still not having my wrestling men.

Yesterday, I had this dream. I don't normally dream, and definitely don't remember any, but I do believe they mean something and I'm fascinated by them. I was some sort of biker, and got involved in some races. At one of my first races there was a crowd scene around the best biker there and he had loads of hot girls around him, the whole star thing. And on this other side, there was this girl standing all alone, it was like only I could see her beauty, I went up to her and we began to talk. We ended up falling in love and were really happy together. (Oh by the way, I was played by some random beautiful guy, there was no one I know in real life in the dream). Blah blah blah moving the story forward... I become pretty much the best biker around, beating out this other guy. After this race, the hot chick from before came over and pretty much threw herself at me. I lent in to kiss her and then remember screaming "Nooooo, Bilal!" and woke up. If anyone has any theories on it, I would be intrigued to hear them.

Thought/Quote/Lyric of the Day...

"But I don't have a job, a car, or a girlfriend?"

"Jesus, I should have shot you while I had the chance!"

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